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Title: “The Goose is Loose”

Authors: Richard “Goose” Gossage and Russ Pate

Publisher: Ballantine Books

Price: $25

This might have been a successful endeavor, but for the fact Gossage, the onetime flame-throwing relief pitcher, too often finds ways to be annoying.

Exhibit A: He describes a 1983 “memorable caper” he carried out with some New York Yankee teammates on the roof of a Boston hotel.

With a giant slingshot fashioned from rubber tubing and a four-foot funnel, Gossage described firing water balloons far into the night sky. But let Gossage describe it:

“Good citizens of Boston walking down the street saw a cloudless sky one moment and found themselves drenched by a cloudburst the next. But where were the clouds?

“Meanwhile, we were up on the roof laughing like 6-year-olds at recess. . . .”

Later that same night, Gossage writes, one of his teammates reassembled the slingshot in front of a bar and fired a water balloon into its plate glass window, shattering it.

He also describes a night in New York when he was caught by a security officer urinating into a potted plant in a hotel lobby.

The idea that Gossage, now 49, still finds all this funny is troubling enough. Nevertheless, he glibly goes on about his 22-year career, pointing out numerous character flaws in others.

Rickey Henderson, for example. Of his Oakland teammate, he writes: “Henderson set a new standard for selfishness. He made Jose Canseco look like a social worker by comparison--Henderson could be obstinate and surly on his good days. Just a joy to be around.”

Of Texas Manager Bobby Valentine: “Valentine that season [1991] proved to be the absolute worst handler of a pitching staff I’d ever been around.”

And there’s this shot for Ranger teammate Nolan Ryan: “Nolan could have provided more leadership for the Rangers, but he wasn’t a consummate team player. He focused on himself more than the club. He kept a separate agenda.”

Pass.