Ballpark figures

Baseball scouts, to borrow from David Mamet, are the guys behind the guys behind the guys.

They log untold miles searching for young talent, signing ball players and hoping their diamonds in the rough make it to a big league diamond. But like anybody else, they can fall on hard times.

That’s where the Professional Baseball Scouts Foundation steps up to the plate. On Jan. 10, it was a dinner plate.

The nonprofit organization threw its first gala fundraiser at the Beverly Hilton in Beverly Hills, featuring fine food, a wealth of sports memorabilia, and Hall of Famers Ernie Banks and Willie Mays.

Talk of the night at the more than 200 tables centered on Pete Rose’s recent admission that -- contrary to years of earlier denials -- he in fact bet on baseball. The confession sparked heated discussion but prompted no table-clearing brawls or hefty fines. The crowd was overall a well-behaved bunch. In other words, no tobacco stains anywhere.

Former Dodger manager Tommy Lasorda guided the proceedings, tossing the occasional screwball -- “The duty of the master of ceremonies is not to bore you, but to call upon the people who will.”

Maybe he stole the line from former “Saturday Night Live” cast member Joe Piscopo, who was on hand to do “the Frank thing.” The New Jersey comedian changed the lyrics of the Sinatra standard “Lady Is a Tramp” to “Tommy Is a Champ.” Not a dry eye in the house.

Guests competed for silent auction prizes, such as a bat autographed by Tony Gwynn or a ball signed by the entire 1947 Pittsburgh Pirates. Football, hockey and basketball were represented as well, with donations of a Marcus Allen shoe, Wayne Gretzky’s jersey and a Larry Bird basketball -- all autographed.

Pop culture pitched in too. A negligee worn by Marilyn Monroe had a reserve price of $15,000, and a suit donned by Rat Packer Sammy Davis Jr. asked $3,500.

The evening could have provoked a bit of mike envy, though. Bidding for microphones used by Ozzy Osbourne started at $1,000, while one once near the apparently more famous lips of Mick Jagger began at $1,500.

The evening would bring in over $250,000 for the 7-month-old foundation.