Cardinal Sin Here Is Losing

THE COLLEGES Football’s newest powerhouses--Texas at El Touchdown Paso (3-0) and Cal State Adventureland (2-2)--kept their winning streaks alive. And the Mildcats of Northwestern (0-2-1) managed to gain a tie with Northern Illinois, 16-16.

Fortunately, there’s a new loser on the block, Stanford (0-3). Yes, the same school that was a force in college football several decades ago when Jim Plunkett was quarterback. Since then, the school’s adopted a color--Cardinal--as its nickname. It’s tough to be a fighting color.

Tulsa (0-4) suffered a double insult. First, a 0-65 thumping by Oklahoma. Then, the news that Associated Press voters were so unimpressed by the margin of victory that they actually gave the Sooners nine fewer first place votes than the week before.

Elsewhere, Tracey Finchum of Bethany College and Mark Kern of Washington & Jefferson College were named the Presidents’ Athletic Conference players of the week, which raises a question. When was Bethany in the White House?

The Rankings:

Team, Record Last Loss Next Loss 1. Stanford (0-3) 17-24,S.Jose St. UCLA 2. Purdue (0-2-1) 20-44, N.Dame Minnesota 3. Kansas (0-3) 11-16, La. Tech S.Illinois 4. Columbia (0-2) 7-38, Lafayette Penn 5. Miss (1-3) 24-31, Tulane* Georgia 6. Texas (1-2) Def. Ore.St. Rice 7. Mich. State (1-2) 3-31, Fla. State Iowa 8. (Tie)Pacific (1-3) 3-31, Washington N.Mex. St. 8. Wash.**(3-1) Def. Pacific, 31-3 Oregon 10. UCLA (3-1)*** Def. Arizona Stanford

11. Tulsa (0-4); 12. Nevada Circus Circus (0-2); 13.-16. Pentagon (Army, Navy, Air Force, Maine Maritime (5-8); 17. Oklahoma’s passing attack (held to a humiliating 4 completions in 12 attempts against Tulsa); 18. Northwestern (0-2-1); 19. Idle; 20. Arkansas (2-1) (believed to be first No. 10-ranked team to lose a game by 44 points).

*Tulane still undefeated in Superdome since Pope John Paul II’s appearance there.

**Washington Coach Don James said of his team’s performance: “I’m disappointed . . . We’re just not a very good football team right now.”

***Should UCLA be tied with Stanford? After all, the Bruins’ Terry Donahue said: “They (Stanford) could just as easily be 3-0. . . . I really think Stanford’s situation is no different than ours.” Guess who UCLA plays Saturday.

ROUT OF THE WEEK: Rice (2-2) over Texas (1-2).

CRUMMY GAME OF THE WEEK: Bowling Green (1-3) at Arizona (1-2).

QUOTEBOOK: Tulane Coach Mack Brown on his next opponent, Vanderbilt: “I think I’m supposed to say they’re well coached. Mother called last night and told me I should.” Brown’s brother, Watson, coaches Vanderbilt.

THE PROS And, now, for those strikeball matchups you’ve waited all week for. Such as: Can Philadelphia’s inimitable quarterback Guido Merkens avoid getting picked off by Chicago’s Egypt Allen?

Sure, the San Francisco Phony Niners have a celebrated wide receiver in Thai Ivery. But will Thai be overshadowed by the New York Ants’ flashy pass catcher, Edwin Lovelady. Can the Los Angeles Shams stop Garland Jean Battiste, the fearsome fullback of the New Orleans Saints Elsewhere? Will Sham center Navy Tuiasasopo complete every snap?

What will happen when Kansas City and wide receiver Nate Blanks line up in the shotgun formation against the L.A. Masqueraiders and cornerback D’Shanon Shamburger? Finally, can Cincinnati make good on its vow to stop San Diego running back Martin Sarten? Or is it Sarten Martin?

Don’t forget to listen to the analysis on the scoreboard shows: CBS’ “NFL Yesterday,” NBC’s “NFL Dead,” and ESPN’s “No GameDay.”

The Rankings:

Team, Record Next Loss 1. Denver Bunkos (1-0-1) Who?ston 2. L.A. Shams (0-2) New Orleans 3. N.Y. Ants (0-2) San Francisco 4. Mylanta Falcons (1-1) The Pitts 5. Buffalo Shills (1-1) Indianapoloss

6. N.O. Saints Elsewhere (1-1); 7. L.A. Masqueraiders (2-0); 8. Chicago Bares (2-0); 9. S.F.Phony Niners (1-1); 10.Green Bay Hackers (0-1-1).

CRUMMY GAME OF THE WEEK: 14-way tie.

STRIKEBALL ALL-STAR TEAM: QB-Joe Pizzo (Cle.); RB-Stacey Driver (Cle.); RB-Topper Clemons (Phil.); WR-Sebron Spivey (Dal.); WR-Joey Clinkscales (Pitt); TE-Arrilke James (Hous.); T-Don Fann (Dall.); T-Paul du Fault (Masqueraiders); G-Doug Hire (Sea.).G-Blake Wingle (Cle.); C-Navy Tuiasasopo (Shams); K-Massimo Manca (Cin.) or Goran Lingmerth (Cle.).

GOOD THINKING DEPT.: A prospective replacement drove up to Rams Park and asked a couple of veterans: “Where do you sign up if you want to play?” He was immediately pelted with eggs.