Did Fish, Game Officials Weasel Out of License?

And now is the time to ferret out an obvious injustice.

Donna Barber of Vista is outraged because of what happened the other day to her beloved ferret, Charlie. She’s upset, but her 6-year-old is beside himself. He may have lost his closest friend.

It seems that ferrets are illegal in California unless the varmint in question is a neutered male and has a special license from the state Department of Fish and Game. When Barber moved to North County from Arizona last year, she applied for such a license.

She mailed in her $25 check, and, by her account, it was cashed on May 7.

Last week, two Fish and Game agents showed up at her door to say, “Sorry, ma’am, you can’t have ferrets in California,” to which Barber howled in protest, “Sure, I can. I applied for a license.”

“Ma’am,” they replied, “we haven’t issued ferret licenses since May of 1987.”

“But you cashed my check!” she protested.

At this point, Barber is as mad as a mama ferret protecting her litter. She believes that cashing the check was tantamount to Fish and Game issuing the license. Officials have told her that the $25 was a “non-refundable application fee”--for a license she’ll never receive.

To add insult to injury, a hearing has been set for July 13. Barber was charged with a misdemeanor once officials found the ferret.

As a compromise to putting Charlie to sleep, Fish and Game shipped the small, weasel-like beast to a ferret camp in Prescott, Ariz. He’s now in safe hands, Barber said, but she and her son remain quite upset, wondering why their ferret is suddenly homeless.

“The irony is, if I had never told them about him, none of this would have happened,” she said.

Names in the Game

Patrick Henry High School is reaping dividends from the exodus of Laotians who came to the United States near the end of the 1970s as part of the mass contingent of boat people from Southeast Asia.

Laotian students have taken courses at Patrick Henry for years. It’s one school that tailors special courses for them.

It seems that Laotians are particularly adept at badminton, so today Patrick Henry’s badminton team--dominated by students from Laos--will receive special recognition from the school board as 1988 CIF champs.

“A number of these kids have grown up with the sport, and they really, really enjoy it,” said Patrick Henry badminton coach Janet Lowry. “They’re quite competitive with it, and many of their parents play it. The sport demands mental quickness, a lot of quick movements and extreme flexibility. These kids are all of the above. They’re also very hard-working.”

The Team:

Outh Chantahchone, Tiffany County, Kheuangkham Daoheuang, Parand Darugar, Mang Insixiengmay, Phoupheth Kettavong, Onn Khamvong, Lamoun Khommarath, Amphayvanh Khounnoraj, Thiphachanh Khounnoraj, Somsack Laosy, Lori Lynch, Vatthana Manisouk, Vilasack Manisouk, Philip Muir, Mike Nauta, Chansanam Nonthavet, Vanxay Phomvong, Somphone Phongvilai, Keo Sangasy, Phone Phay Sayavong, Kiyoko Schut, Manichanh Souphalak, Khonephet Souvannarath and Manisay Vongsenekeo.

Ballot Boo-Boos

Ever since 1948, when the Chicago Tribune committed the classic journalistic sin of printing the headline “Dewey Elected,” it’s generally been assumed that no one can ever assume anything about politics at any time under any circumstances. And yet, the same silly sins keep being repeating.

Such was the case last Tuesday night, when the San Diego County registrar of voters came upon a pair of amusing blunders on the part of local precinct officials.

One woman decided to get the jump on the mandatory--and time-consuming--task of tearing up unused ballots. Since no Democrat had voted throughout the day, she assumed she could rip up the Democratic ballots as early as 6 p.m., two hours before the polls closed. Well, naturally, some Democrats wandered in just as she had finished her tear-up chore and wondered why no ballots were available.

Jerry Mann, chief of operations for the registrar, noted that “fortunately” a roaming trouble-shooter was in the area, and the problem was solved as fast as you could say, “Hey, Truman won after all.”

In another precinct, the worker couldn’t make the number of stubs and ballots match, so she went to bed, figuring she could handle it in the morning. That was a no-no, Mann said. The manana complex just doesn’t cut it in American politics.

“She was hungry,” Mann said. “She wanted to have dinner. She wanted to go to bed, and so she did. Well, that was a big no-no. We had to run her down and get ‘em ourselves. Who said this job was easy?”

A Bite Against Hunger

From the no-comment-necessary department, this ad appeared recently in a local newspaper: “World Runners--Runners and walkers committed to ending hunger by the year 2000 meet at 8 a.m. Saturday for 45-minute workout, followed by doughnuts and coffee.”