Some Guy

Like the young man he plays in director Michael Hoffman’s off-beat comedy “Some Girls,” Patrick Dempsey has experienced rejection where he wanted acceptance, and found love where he least expected it.

In the critically acclaimed film (showing exclusively at the Beverly Center Cineplex), Dempsey’s Michael accepts an invitation to spend the Christmas holidays with his girlfriend’s family, only to discover when he shows up that she no longer cares for him.

Desperate and confused, Michael stays with the close-knit family anyway, eventually receiving love and an invaluable life lesson from his girlfriend’s elderly grandmother.

The desire for acceptance against seemingly overwhelming odds is a feeling Dempsey says he has experienced often in his own life.

“Growing up, I longed for acceptance,” said the 23-year-old actor, recalling his childhood in rural Maine. “I felt like a misfit, an outsider. I was a failure in school as well as socially and I’m still trying to shake some of the insecurity left over from that.”

Curled up barefoot in a big easy chair in the living room of his comfortable Santa Monica home, Dempsey appeared anything but insecure.

Two affectionate Yorkshire terriers jumped in and out of his lap; his friend, Rick Stevenson, the producer of “Some Girls,” jogged by the house and was persuaded to stay for a piece of pie; a photographer snapped pictures as he spoke; his wife-manager-coach, Rocky Parker, popped into the room periodically to offer gems of insight and wit. And Dempsey maintained an air of pleased contentment throughout it all.

Dempsey is quick to credit his wife of two years with his growing sense of security. She is a petite, vivacious woman who comes across as glowingly confident and not self-conscious about the fact that she is about 30 years older than her husband.

With graying hair, without makeup or pretense, she makes no attempt to disguise her age, and though they kept their marriage secret for two years, neither she nor Dempsey is uncomfortable discussing their age difference.

Dempsey jokes about the fact that Rocky’s three grown children are all older than he is and refers to one of her sons as his best friend. He also notes with humor that his career has been launched playing characters who have affairs with older women. He played Sonny Wisecarver in “In the Mood,” the true story of a Los Angeles teen-ager who ran off with two older women (one at a time) during World War II, and in the upcoming “Loverboy,” he plays a pizza delivery boy who delivers more than pizza to an assortment of lonely older women.

Dempsey and Parker met 3 1/2 years ago when both were touring in “Brighton Beach Memoirs”.

“We were on the road for a year,” Parker said, “and since it was a young cast, I kind of became the mom. I had taught acting for years so we would all get together when we weren’t working and do scenes or rent videos and watch old films.”

“That ‘mom’ word scares me a little bit,” Dempsey interjected, teasingly.

She laughed, “Well, I’ve been a mom for so long . . .”

When asked how they came to marry, Parker threw up her hands.

“I don’t know how it happened,” she said. “I thought it was insane when a young cousin of mine got involved with an older woman years ago. But then when it happens to you . . .,” her voice trailed off. “You certainly don’t look for it, but it teaches you to never say ‘never.’ ”

“I like being in a relationship with someone who’s lived through more than I have,” Dempsey volunteered. “If I was with someone my own age, I don’t think it would work. We’d both be too inexperienced, too caught up in our own stuff. Rocky has helped me tremendously just by assuring me that I’m OK and not stupid.”

Childhood feelings of stupidity were not uncommon for Dempsey.

“I had learning difficulties that made me think I was mentally inferior,” he said. “I was in the seventh grade before my parents found out I was dyslexic and by then my self-esteem was really low. Even now, I sometimes get nervous around very intelligent people, wondering if I’ll be able to hold a conversation, or worried that I’ll get stuck if I feel pressured to read something.

“I used to have to prepare a week in advance for a script reading. Rocky got me to practice reading out loud every day. She taught me to relax about it, take it easy. Now I do a lot of meditation to get calm, then I can go in and read it over once and I’m OK.”

In “Some Girls,” Dempsey has a film encounter with an older woman unlike any he’s played before. The relationship that develops between his character, Michael, and Granny, played by Lila Kedrova (Oscar winner for her supporting role in “Zorba the Greek”), provides the most touching moments in the film.

Granny, who is senile and near death, is convinced Michael is her dead husband come to rescue her. When she escapes from the hospital, Michael finds her in the snow-covered forest, wet and cold, trying to find her way to the home she had shared with her husband.

He takes her to the house, gently helps her to undress, wraps her in warm blankets and allows her to fall peacefully asleep in the cradle of his arm. The next morning, he follows her to a nearby abandoned chapel where she talks to him (thinking he is her husband) about God and about their life together. Dempsey said these scenes changed his life.

“Whenever Lila came on the set it was magical for me; she was so natural and real. While we were doing the scene in the chapel it hit me that I didn’t really believe in God, didn’t really trust, and that it has been a major problem throughout my life. I saw that I need to trust, to be willing to get out of the way and allow it to happen.

“The character I play feels lost, unconnected, because his girlfriend has rejected him. Then he learns from Granny that you feel wholeness in God, not in another person. In our society, we’re led to believe that if you sleep with a certain amount of women, you’ll find self-worth, or that if you have a gorgeous girlfriend, life will be perfect. But it’s not true.”

In a scant two years, Dempsey has gone from an actor who couldn’t get film work (“I first had to learn how to be comfortable with a piece of paper in front of me--cold readings were a nightmare”) to one who enjoys the luxury of as much work as he wants. He’s made six films almost back-to-back, and has two more coming out this year--Joan Micklin Silver’s “Loverboy” for Tri-Star and “Happy Together,” (Apollo Films) a romantic comedy set for fall release.

Dempsey’s directors have high praise for his ability to swing between comedy and drama in the same role with the ease of a much more seasoned actor.

“I really didn’t know how gifted Patrick was when we signed him for ‘Some Girls’,” director Hoffman said. “I had seen glimmers but I had no idea of his emotional range. Because our film starts out as a comedy of sexual manners and then starts to look deeper, expanding out to explore family, memory, work and God, Patrick’s role requires great range and believability. His talent for projecting this wonderful bemused, bewildered ‘everyman’ image is what made it work.”

Silver said she was impressed by Dempsey’s talent for physical comedy, “which is very rare to find in a young actor. He is exceptionally inventive, constantly coming up with ideas. Audiences respond immediately to his innate, innocent charm and his fabulous use of body language.”

In “Loverboy,” Dempsey delivers pizzas and romance to beautiful, lonely women played by Kirstie Alley, Carrie Fisher, Kim Miyori and Barbara Carrera. The film is a light comedy romp that allows Dempsey to demonstrate the balance and coordination skills he learned as a boy by mastering downhill skiing, unicycle riding and juggling.

His graceful clumsiness reflects a vulnerability producer Gary Foster wanted.

“Patrick has a Buster Keaton comedic quality that gets the audience’s sympathy while they’re laughing at his predicament,” Foster said.

Next, Dempsey will play a less innocent character “with more of an edge” in “Coupe de Ville.”

Meanwhile, Dempsey fills his days with his favorite pastime--acting--in a small studio behind his home that serves as his workshop.

“This is why I bought the house,” he said, guiding a visitor through the studio. “Rocky teaches here, and we have a group that gets together to do scenes. I’m not into Hollywood partying. I’d much rather be here, surrounded by creative people who generate a positive energy. It keeps me tuned up.”