Maybe He Should Be Called Humble Gumbel

Words cannot express the dismay caused by NBC’s appointment of Bryant Gumbel as its new golf host. I predict that what took Arnold Palmer years to build into a premier sport will take this dandy six months to relegate to a position below mud-wrestling.

First, my sympathies to Johnny Miller, who will serve His Majesty as golf analyst. Johnny’s fate has been sealed by NBC Sports’ comment that: “He is absolutely independent. He’s honest and contemporary and fully willing to speak his mind.” I’ll give Johnny a tenure of three or four tournaments with this champion of affectation. The moment Johnny steps on a royal toe, the surreptitious memos will overheat BG’s PC.

Finally, visualize the credits at the end of each match. Fragrance: by Elizabeth Taylor (Golf has been his Passion.) Hair: by Vidal Sassoon. Makeup: by Cher. Clothes: by all of the tailors on Savile Row who supplied 150 suits for the last Olympics. Jewelry: by Mr. T.

TED ROGERS, San Diego