Standard Punch-Lines
From Associated Press
LONDON — Punch is the only magazine cited in The Oxford Dictionary of Quotations, a standard reference work. Among the Punch jokes cited between 1845 and 1902 are these:
* “Advice to persons about to marry--Don’t.”
* “What is better than presence of mind in a railway accident? Absence of body.”
* “Never do today what you can put off till tomorrow.”
* “Go directly--see what she’s doing, and tell her she mustn’t.”
* “It’s worse than wicked, my dear, it’s vulgar.”
* “Look here, Steward, if this is coffee, I want tea; but if this is tea, then I wish for coffee.”