Will Winners Pour Perrier on the Coach?

The Disneyland Pigskin Classic, which will match Stanford against Texas A&M; on Aug. 26 at Anaheim Stadium, appears on all of the schedules as the first game of the college football season, but technically it’s not. First to hit the field will be tiny Albright College of Reading, Pa., and the national football team of France in something called the Vichy Classic.

The game--yes, American football--will be played on Aug. 15 in the French city of Vichy, and it will be the main attraction of the town’s annual American Festival. The French are paying all expenses except air fare for Albright, which plays football at the NCAA Division III level. Adding to the festivities will be the Baylor University cheerleaders and a Lions Club band from suburban Washington.

Albright isn’t a powerhouse, even among Division III programs. The Lions have compiled a 16-44 record the last six years. But the French aren’t complaining.

According to the NCAA News, the Vichy Bowl is expected to be televised throughout France.

Trivia time: What was the last year the NFL exhibition season opened with a game between the College All-Stars and the defending NFL champion?

Planes, trains and autos: The itinerary prepared by Barry Waters, the Houston Astros’ traveling secretary, for the monster trip--28 games, 26 days, eight cities--that will keep the Astros out of town while the Republicans take over the Houston Astrodome for their convention this month ran seven pages, five pages longer than the handout usually required when the Astros go on the road.

Astro pitcher Jimmy Jones told Waters that the itinerary was “like a novel.”

Replied Waters: “Yeah, you can’t wait to get to the last page, right?”

At any rate, when the Astros are finished reading Waters’ creation, they will have plenty of time for other literary pursuits. According to Ray Buck of the Houston Post, members of the traveling party could get through “War and Peace” on the trip simply by reading 52 pages a day.

Add planes: By the time they get home on Aug. 23, the Astros will have taken nine flights and 56 buses. They will have covered 9,231 miles and changed time zones five times. And each player will have gone through $1,622 in meal money.

Last add planes: Neil Hohlfeld, who covers the Astros for the Houston Chronicle, suggests that the team adopt the nickname of its farm club in the Class-A South Atlantic League: the Asheville Tourists.

Trivia answer: It was 1976. The College All-Stars lost the last 12 games in the series, which existed for 42 years.

Quotebook: Spike Dykes, Texas Tech football coach, on what the first week of August means to him: “Starting this week, it’s ‘Goodby, Dear, football’s here.’ ”