Politicians Take Gridiron Club’s Yearly Drubbing

WASHINGTON —  With the pop of deflating egos as background noise, the 111th annual production of the Gridiron Club turned up the heat on official Washington on Saturday night. But in keeping with tradition, it left its big-name victims only singed, not burned.

In a ritual lampooning dating to President Harrison’s time, President Clinton--and the Republicans who would be glad to see him ousted--were set for an evening of chuckles and squirms.

The Gridiron Club, a band of 60 Washington newspaper bureau chiefs, columnists, reporters, cartoonists and editors, exists only for the yearly scoffing at Washington’s mightiest.

In one skit, an actor playing Clinton advisor Dick Morris, with top hat and tails black on one side, white on the other, told his client to “flip-flop” and steal Republican issues to regain his political stride.

“Morris”: “We’ll preach family values, budget cuts, prayer in school--if we take all their issues they’ll just stand there and drool. We’ve got to flip-flop to keep the White House spot.” The chorus: “He will keep flippin’ and a-floppin,’ fudgin’ and a-smudgin,’ bobbin’ and a-weavin,’ rollin’ and a-pollin.’ ”

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Here’s the Gridiron take on other characters of 1996:

* House Republican freshmen: “We are the class of ‘94, Ready for warfare on the floor. Reaching agreement is such a bore. Yeeaah!”

* Sen. Bill Bradley of New Jersey, who is retiring from office: “The place we work in has turned into a zoo. There is no respect for elders and free lunches are taboo. Our party is in shambles--a doomed minority. The right to be defeatist--that’s America to me.”

Jack Nelson, Gridiron president and chief Washington correspondent for the Los Angeles Times, got the evening started with the traditional “speech in the dark.”

An excerpt: “[Ronald] Reagan had a chance to be President Ford’s running mate. But like Colin Powell, he spurned the idea of being second banana. Reagan said the vice presidency reminded him of an old rule of dog sledding: Only the lead dog gets a change of scenery.”