THE TIMES’ RANKING / TOP TO BOTTOM : CAPSULES AND RANKINGS

Team: 1. Buffalo (1-0)

Opponent: New England

Comment: Bills win one for the poll’s credibility, now may go undefeated.

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Team: 2. Green Bay (1-0)

Opponent: Philadelphia

Comment: Packers audition on Monday night TV to become land’s new darlings.

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Team: 3. San Francisco (1-0)

Opponent: St. Louis

Comment: Who needs a runner when you open against the Saints, Rams?

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Team: 4. Denver (1-0)

Opponent: at Seattle

Comment: Every poll has a longshot and pollster disavows selection if wrong.

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Team: 5. Kansas City (1-0)

Opponent: Oakland

Comment: Every team should have a good quarterback. Too bad for Chiefs.

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Team: 6. Dallas (0-1)

Opponent: N.Y. Giants

Comment: Emmitt rises from dead and Cowboys get new life against N.Y. stiffs.

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Team: 7. Detroit (0-1)

Opponent: Tampa Bay

Comment: Poll reserves the right to remain stubborn--even stupid.

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Team: 8. Miami (1-0)

Opponent: at Arizona

Comment: J.J. gets Cardinals, Jets next--teams even Switzer could beat.

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Team: 9. Philadelphia (1-0)

Opponent: at Green Bay

Comment: Eagles get fat on NFC East foe, but are they this good?

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Team: 10. Indianapolis (1-0)

Opponent: at N.Y. Jets

Comment: Still waiting for Colts to return to earth, but until then . . .

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Team: 11. San Diego (1-0)

Opponent: Cincinnati

Comment: Two home games to start, two wins before Chargers start free fall.

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Team: 12. Chicago (1-0)

Opponent: at Washington

Comment: A) Were Bears that good? B) Were Cowboys that bad? Answer: B.

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Team: 13. St. Louis (1-0)

Opponent: at San Francisco

Comment: Notice to all civilians: Lawrence Phillips is in the state.

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Team: 14. Houston (0-1)

Opponent: at Jacksonville

Comment: Nashville-Jacksonville showdown; even USFL didn’t resort to that.

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Team: 15. Washington (0-1)

Opponent: Chicago

Comment: Can’t do it yet, but poll predicts Redskins passing Bears.

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Team: 16. Baltimore (1-0)

Opponent: at Pittsburgh

Comment: Crab cakes are overrated, just like this bunch.

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Team: 17. New England (0-1)

Opponent: at Buffalo

Comment: Which comes first? Halley’s comet or a good game from Bledsoe?

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Team: 18. Carolina (1-0)

Opponent: at New Orleans

Comment: Peter O’Malley: Look how quick an expansion franchise can rise.

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Team: 19. Minnesota (1-0)

Opponent: at Atlanta

Comment: Brad Johnson or Warren Moon? Tells you something about Moon.

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Team: 20. Pittsburgh (0-1)

Opponent: Baltimore

Comment: Let’s play, “Who quarterbacks the Steelers this week?”

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Team: 21. Cincinnati (0-1)

Opponent: at San Diego

Comment: Ki-Jana Carter meet Tony Mandarich; that’s the way it’s looking.

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Team: 22. Jacksonville (1-0)

Opponent: Houston

Comment: Week 5 showdown with Carolina looking like must-see TV.

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Team: 23. Oakland (0-1)

Opponent: at Kansas City

Comment: Bob Dole was a young senator last time the Raiders won.

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Team: 24. New Orleans (0-1)

Opponent: Carolina

Comment: Just when it looks like Everett will rise, the phantom gets him.

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Team: 25. Seattle (0-1)

Opponent: Denver

Comment: The Seahawks played like a Los Angeles football team.

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Team: 26. Atlanta (0-1)

Opponent: Minnesota

Comment: Run-and-shoot=hunt-and-peck: six points/words per game/minute.

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Team: 27. Arizona (0-1)

Opponent: Miami

Comment: Coach begs fans to show up; team may start paying fans to come.

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Team: 28. New York Giants (0-1)

Opponent: at Dallas

Comment: Dan Reeves’ lugs have a chance to go 2-0 in moral victories.

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Team: 29. New York Jets (0-1)

Opponent: Indianapolis

Comment: Ha-ha-ha.

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Team: 30. Tampa Bay (0-1)

Opponent: at Detroit

Comment: Fans vote to keep Bucs, Bucs start Dilfer. Must be the water.