He Makes Party a Nightmare

Dear Cynthia: I’ve been dating my boyfriend for 2 1/2 years and living with him for nine months. I’ve had many similar dreams about him. He will be at a party or event, and he is speaking with a girl or woman and does not acknowledge anyone else. I’m also having dreams in which he wants to break up with me because he’s found someone else--one of my sisters, in fact!

Years ago, one of my sisters did go out with a boyfriend of mine. And I once did the same to another sister. Am I feeling guilty about the past or just a little insecure about my relationship since it seems to be getting close to the proposal stage right now? Please help!

--SLEEPLESS IN STUDIO CITY

Dear Reader: Since you may be approaching one of the biggest decisions you will make in your life, it makes perfect sense that you would explore each side of the question in your dreams. In the dreams where your boyfriend is talking with one woman and is oblivious to everything else, he represents your desire that he will want and be satisfied with you alone. In the other dream, you explore the fear that he will find someone else. Your frame of reference includes your sister because of your experience and guilt. But to a woman, “sister” represents any female.

After 2 1/2 years, including nine months of living together, you should know your boyfriend pretty well. I suggest you discuss your dreams with him. Ask him how he feels about fidelity. Does he believe that he can be satisfied for the rest of his life with you (and you with him)? This natural concern is haunting your dreams and needs to be cleared up in your waking state.

Fax your dreams to Cynthia Richmond at (213) 237-0732 or e-mail them to in.your.dreams@worldnet.att.net. Please include your hometown and a daytime phone number. “In Your Dreams” appears every other Monday and should be read for entertainment purposes only.

Cynthia Richmond explains children’s dreams on our Kids’ Reading Room page every Wednesday.