Not Your Regular Joe Six-Pack

As he has every December for the last half century, Harley Thronson of Long Beach received a six-pack in the mail from Dick Hamilton.

It’s Hamilton’s way of thanking Thronson, whose PT boat rescued Hamilton and his shipwrecked crew from an island held by Japanese soldiers during World War II.

Hamilton went on to become a professor of horticulture at the University of Hawaii, where he gained renown as an expert on the harvesting of macadamia nuts.

Hence, the annual gift to Thronson: Six cans of macadamia nuts.

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THE RESULTS WILL BE IN ANY DAY: I’m passing along a copy of a Florida-style ballot that was sent out by Mayor Richard Riordan (see accompanying). Hope the recount ends before the party.

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THE CHOCOLATE PLANET? A colleague pointed out that there was something suspicious about a photo taken by Malin Space Science Systems (see photo).

It shows the surface of Mars. But which Mars? The planet? Or the candy bar? (Looks like a Milky Way to me.)

Remember the movie, “Capricorn One” (1978) about a manned flight to Mars that turns out to be a hoax? How do we know that Malin Space didn’t take this shot in a chocolate factory? Sure, go ahead and snicker.

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GUERRILLA COPY EDITORS REPORT: Some adventures with the English language spotted by column readers:

* A laundry that boasts it has a plant on “promises” (submitted by Gerald DeRuiter of L.A.).

* An ad for plantation “shudders” (John Stevenson of Chatsworth).

* A job opening with salary “commiserate” with experience (Joyce Hiller of Redondo Beach).

* A church festival of “scared” music (Julaine Konselman).

* A sale of clothes with such prestigious labels as Bullocks “Wilsher” and “I-Magnum” (Robin Reidy).

* A discussion of the “immorality” of Beethoven’s Ninth Symphony (Dennis and Diane Baker).

* A flier about bones of “pre-existing” mastodons (Anne Finnegan of Mission Viejo).

* And a headline that says, “Bacteria talk today” (from Jeff Haas of Huntington Beach, who admits it may be a big breakthrough but warns, “I bet you have to get your ear right down near them to hear what they have to say.”)

miscelLAny:

In a hotel corridor, Jim Rosenberg of Van Nuys found the ideal spot for people who don’t know whether they’re coming or going (see photo). I put myself in that category, by the way.

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Steve Harvey can be reached at (800) LATIMES, Ext. 77083, by fax at (213) 237-4712, by mail at Metro, L.A. Times, 202 W. 1st St., L.A., 90012 and by e-mail at steve.harvey@latimes.com.