This Approach to Phone Calls Might Just Drive You to Distraction

Connie Kerrigan of Canoga Park saw an ad for a “car phone holder” that “has a special space for a pencil--so you can take notes as you chat.”

“Just what we need,” groaned Kerrigan.

What next? A device to enable car phone users to steer with their knees?

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NO WAY TO END A RELATIONSHIP: A decidedly unromantic recycle bin caught the eye of Eve Williams of Woodland Hills (see photo). “It appeared in my market parking lot on Valentine’s Day,” Williams said. “Coincidence? I think not.”

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RECYCLE OR TRASH? I’m still getting questions about the provocative black-and-white “April 9th” billboards that seem to be popping up everywhere in Southern California (see photo).

For those of you who are unaware, they were put up to advertise the Arena League opener of L.A.’s newest football team, the Avengers, at Staples Center.

Alas, Arena League officials announced last week that the 2000 season has been canceled due to a labor dispute with the players. But at least you now know why some guy was going to put his hands between another man’s legs and bark like a dog. He wanted a salary hike.

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If there are any errors in today’s column, blame them on the Leap Year computer bug.

Steve Harvey can be reached at (800) LATIMES, Ext. 77083, by fax at (213) 237-4712, by mail at Metro, L.A. Times, Times Mirror Square, L.A. 90053 and at steve.harvey@latimes.com.