Winning Replaces Whining

The Eagles enter the final Sunday of November atop the NFC East standings, the 76ers are 10-1, the Flyers lead the NHL’s Atlantic Division, and the Phillies haven’t lost a game in weeks. Unbridled success is running rampant through the streets of Philadelphia and, quite frankly, the local citizenry isn’t coping.

“I don’t know how to react,” said one rattled caller to Philadelphia radio station WIP’s midday sports talk show. “I don’t know what to do.”

This is a strange new world for fans in a town where the prized historical landmark, the Liberty Bell, is renowned primarily for being cracked.

“[Fans] have been conditioned over the last decade to call and complain,” WIP sports-talk host Anthony Gargano told the Philadelphia Daily News.

Of course, the bliss might not last through the weekend. Tough road game against the Redskins, who looked impressive beating the Rams on Monday night. But when was the last time Philadelphia observed Thanksgiving with no one to boo except Mom for her undercooked turkey? The line: Redskins by 7.

THEY ARE USED TO SHAGGING SHANKS AND SLICES

New Orleans (7-4) at St. Louis (8-3), 10 a.m., Channel 11: Meanwhile, in New Orleans, times are so grim that Billy Joe Tolliver--affectionately known throughout the league as Billy Joe Overthrow--was given a hero’s welcome for rejoining the team as emergency help in the wake of quarterback Jeff Blake’s season-ending injury. Tolliver, who will back up rookie Aaron Brooks and Jake Delhomme, had been out of work since the Saints cut him in August. In the interim, he tried to keep in shape by throwing to driving-range workers at his Shreveport country club. “They were mostly stationary targets,” Tolliver reports, which would explain his unusually high 2-to-1 completion-to-interception ratio. The line: Rams by 13 1/2.

BYLINE IS MIDDLETON, STYLE IS FRANK

Buffalo (7-4) at Tampa Bay (6-5), 10 a.m., Channel 2: With pundits such as Buccaneer offensive guard Frank Middleton, does Tampa really need newspaper columnists? “We’re in trouble. We’ve got to win out,” said Middleton after the Buccaneers were upset last week in Chicago. Speaking of the Bears, Middleton added, “I think they have the worst defense in the NFL. So what does that say about our offense? . . . This is as bad a loss as you can imagine. And it came against the a team that is worse than you can imagine.” Give that man a press badge. The line: Buccaneers by 3 1/2.

TONY SOPRANO ALSO A PROVEN TEAM LEADER

Miami (8-3) at Indianapolis (7-4), 1:15 p.m., Channel 2: Dan Marino spent the early part of this week interviewing Jay Fiedler, telephoning Damon Huard with keep-your-head-up advice and answering questions about the quarterback most Dolphin fans would like to see in the starting lineup: Dan Marino. “I could play right now,” said Marino, now an NFL analyst for HBO. “But could I go through a whole season risking certain kinds of injuries? I don’t really need to take that risk right now. No teams have called.” Memo to Saints, Chargers, Browns, Bengals, Bears, Seahawks, Cardinals, Falcons and Ravens: Phone number for HBO is in the book. The line: Colts by 6.

THIS NEVER WOULD HAVE HAPPENED AT THE PLAYBOY MANSION

Chicago (3-8) at New York Jets (7-4), 10 a.m.: Even while he is hurt and unable to one-hop passes, Cade McNown finds inventive ways to embarrass the Bears’ organization. The latest: McNown failed to show Tuesday at a team-sponsored charity function at a Chicago homeless shelter, where McNown was supposed to join a few teammates to mingle with and sign autographs for underprivileged children. McNown claimed a mix-up, saying he told a team employee over the weekend that he wouldn’t attend the event but that the message never reached the right Bear officials. Of course it didn’t. It was intercepted. The line: Jets by 7.

AND IF THE JAGUARS FAIL, THERE’S ALWAYS ERR MCNAIR

Tennessee (9-2) at Jacksonville (4-7), 1:15 p.m.: The Titans are 9-2 and reeling, having failed to score a touchdown against Pittsburgh, losing by a point to Baltimore, turning the ball over seven times against Cleveland and now traveling to Jacksonville to face a Jaguar team rather miffed about its 0-4 record against the Titans. Of course, Tennessee Coach Jeff Fisher is fearing the worst: “[The Jaguars] are potentially more dangerous this week . . . because the pressure for them to win the division has been alleviated. They really have nothing at stake other than to beat us and make our lives miserable.” The line: Titans by 3.

MORE YARDS IN ONE GAME THAN EVEN STEVE TENSI

Denver (7-4) at Seattle (4-7), 1:15 p.m.: The greatest single-game passing performance in Denver Bronco history was not turned in by John Elway. Or Craig Morton. Or Charley Johnson. Or Frank Tripucka. Or Brian Griese. No, no man wearing Bronco orange and blue has ever passed for more yards in one game than journeyman/backup Gus Frerotte’s 462 against San Diego last week, accomplished while throwing four interceptions during a one-point victory against an 0-11 opponent. Stumped Bronco fans, many of them avid fishermen, are still uncertain whether to throw this one back. The line: Broncos by 3.

RAVENS ALSO MASTERS OF THEIR OWN DOMAIN

Cleveland (3-9) at Baltimore (8-4), 10 a.m.: The startling sight of forward passes suddenly being thrown and caught by players in Raven uniforms has everybody in Baltimore talking playoffs--everybody but the Ravens. Coach Brian Billick, a superstitious type, has banned the word “playoffs” around the team’s training facility, threatening to fine anyone in the organization heard uttering it. Instead, Raven employees are using the word “festivus,” borrowed from a “Seinfeld” episode about a pretend holiday. Proper usage, as demonstrated by Billick: “I’m certainly conscious of what the atmosphere would be in a ‘festivus’ attitude.” The line: Ravens by 15 1/2.

MITCHELL THROWS A NICE, SOFT DOWN-AND-OUT, FANS REPORT

Pittsburgh (5-6) at Cincinnati (2-9), 10 a.m.: Given the choice between starting a perfectly fit Akili Smith and a broken-down Scott Mitchell with a brace strapped to his sprained left knee, Bengal Coach Dick LeBeau, of course, is going with Mitchell. By way of elaboration, Bengal center Rich Braham put it this away about Smith: “At times, I don’t know if he panics. He has a great arm, sometimes just throws it too hard. If you’re 15 yards away and he’s throwing a bullet, who’s going to catch it?” Interesting. Fans seated in the field boxes at Paul Brown Stadium have lodged the same complaint. The line: Steelers by 4.

IN OAKLAND, FINGERS ARE NOT POINTED, THEY ARE BROKEN

Atlanta (3-9) at Oakland (9-2), 1 p.m.: The lost offense of Atlanta, last seen buried by San Francisco’s 31st-ranked defense, reached new depths in a 16-6 loss to the 49ers, failing to complete a pass to Terance Mathis for the first time in 60 games. “I got shut out,” said Mathis, the Falcons’ all-time receptions leader. “I am not happy about that.” He didn’t want to say much more because “I’d get fined, suspended and everything else right now. We thought we could win. We had opportunities to win the game. You could point the finger at everything.” The line: Raiders by 11.

SYMPATHY FOR THE DEVIL

Kansas City (5-6) at San Diego (0-11), 1:15 p.m.: Holiday wishes for Charger fans from Ryan Leaf: “I want to be one of those quarterbacks that struggled early in his career, but made something out of it and stayed with the same team.” Sorry, Ryan. As Mick Jagger once put it, you can’t always get what you want. But, you know, if you try some time, you just might find, you get what you need. And, sure enough, all 31 existing NFL franchises are located in cities with luxury golf courses. The line: No line.

CAREER OPPORTUNITIES

New York Giants (7-4) at Arizona (3-8), 5:15 p.m., ESPN: What’s black and blue and red and white all over? The Arizona Cardinals, of course--the team that wears the same colors as the Red Cross. As the injured bodies pile up around him, Coach Dave McGinnis couldn’t say enough about Cardinal running back Michael Pittman, who gained 49 yards in 13 carries while playing with badly aching ribs last Sunday. “Whatever I do,” McGinnis said, “if I open up a Dairy Queen on Southern Avenue, this guy is going with me.” When you’re a Cardinal, it’s always smart to plan ahead. The line: No line.

WIFE CAN RUN, HUSBAND CAN’T HIDE

Green Bay (5-6) at Carolina (4-7), Monday, 6 p.m., Channel 7: While Panther quarterback Steve Beuerlein prepares for another postseason at home from the playoffs, his wife Kristen is preparing to run in a marathon in December. “I think she’s crazy for doing that,” Beuerlein says. “She says I can’t call her crazy because I [play football] for a living. But I told her running marathons doesn’t buy houses.” True, but Kristen has seen the Panthers play. At least when you run a marathon, the excruciating pain will end after about five hours. The line: Packers by 1.