Throwing Some Light on Dreifort’s Problem

The wife said she wanted to do some remodeling. And Darren Dreifort thinks he was having a bad day.

I thought she was talking about making the bed or asking the daughter who can’t get a date to move out, so obviously I was all for it.

Next thing I know she has me talking to an electrician, who is a gung-ho Kings’ fan, calling me at 7 a.m. to talk about the good old days when Craig Johnson was playing hockey here, and did I know he was on his way to Germany to play?

Richard Holly went on to tell me that Brea Electric has been in business since 1928 -- amazing, because I couldn’t wait to hang up on the hockey chatter box. Minutes later he had Vincent Marcuccella and Luis Witmer pounding on the door as if they couldn’t wait to go to work, and apparently I misunderstood -- they haven’t had any business since 1928.

The wife told them to “spare no expense,” which is kind of her motto if you recall the wedding chair covers.

She had them install a light back where the dogs do their business so they could see what they’re doing at night.

“The dogs are afraid of the dark,” the wife said, and I’ll need a few minutes to think if she’s ever suggested a dumber idea.

Oh yeah, having the daughter who can’t get a date moving back home.

Anyway, I got to thinking as I was replanting the rose bushes that the dogs will dig up in the middle of the night now that they can see them again -- would I be willing right now to change places with Dreifort?

I know this, I’d be getting a wife at least 20 years younger in the deal.

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BUT WOULD you be willing to get booed every time you made an appearance in your home city? Would you be willing to pitch only one inning a game because you have a sore hip and face surgery for a fifth time on your knee for $11 million? And $11 million next year?

The answer, of course, is yes.

Because I’m guessing there’s not going to be much sympathy for Dreifort since most fans were hoping the team would shut him down anyway, and the knee injury takes away any temptation the Micro Manager might have had to keep the eighth-inning experiment going.

And besides, we’d all like to earn $11 million for doing nothing. Which reminds me, I just ran into Channel 2’s Jim Hill.

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THERE’S PROBABLY no love around here for Dreifort anymore, but I’ve always found him intriguing. He has the end locker in the clubhouse, which is ideally placed for a loner who always looks ready to bolt from the room.

Every time I saw the guy he looked sad, hanging his head as if he was ashamed to be paid so much for doing so little. Insiders say he was not only a workout freak, but the ultimate competitor who wanted to earn his keep only to be frustrated by a body that would not allow it. (Sounds like a column for Plaschke to write when he gets back from Greece.)

There was also some irony in the placement of his locker, and his current situation before Monday night’s injury. To the right of his locker there was a sign reading: “The Road to the World Series Begins Here.” If only that had been true -- there would be no reason to mention Guillermo Mota’s name again.

“I’m not going to get into that,” the Micro Manager said, but I am.

The Dodgers knew Dreifort had a sore hip, which prevented him from being a regular contributor and which put him at risk of injuring another part of his body while trying to compensate. “The hip has been an issue all year,” Jim Tracy said, “and the one [hip] can affect the other [knee].”

And that’s the reason the bullpen-dependent Dodgers should have never dealt Mota.

The way the Dodgers play, they regularly need a setup pitcher to get to Eric Gagne, and so they should have anticipated the toll it would take on Dreifort’s body.

Tracy suggested there were a number of reasons why the deal had to be made, most notably the acquisition of Brad Penny, who is on the disabled list with no word when he’ll pitch again. I haven’t even mentioned the catchers who can’t hit....

The trade, of course, probably won’t cost the Dodgers a playoff berth because the Giants and Padres are so mediocre. And most fans will probably say good riddance to Dreifort and his big salary, but I know what it’s like to have a bad day just because someone had a dumb idea and just wanted to shed a little light on such a crummy turn of events for Dreifort.

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BEFORE THE game I introduced myself to Steve Finley, told him he was too old to help the Dodgers and advised him of my bet with Tracy that he wouldn’t hit 10 homers with the Dodgers. Finley then went out and hit a homer in the first inning.

The things that I do to inspire the Dodgers.

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MILTON BRADLEY promised in a Page 2 column a few weeks back that he wouldn’t get thrown out of another game. On Monday night he came very close to getting ejected, and when I mentioned it to Bradley, he said, “We’re not playing horseshoes.”

Now that’s the Bradley that I’ve come to enjoy.

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TODAY’S LAST word comes in e-mail from Marshall Pinnix:

“My apologies for the previous ‘blank’ e-mail. As a standard practice, I avoid your ridiculous column. Unfortunately I did not Sunday and your column on the Trojans and Chargers was by far and away the most ignorant abuse of sports writing I have ever seen. You have finally removed all doubt that you are an idiot.”

No need to apologize. I particularly enjoyed your blank e-mail.

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T.J. Simers can be reached at t.j.simers@latimes.com. To read previous columns by Simers, go to latimes.com/simers.