Easing the pain of frayed family ties

Patty remembers happy times with her whole family.

“When I lived with my dad and my mom, we always played in the snow together with my sisters,” the 10-year-old says of her days in Iowa. “We’d try to make the best snowman.”

That was a long time ago.

When Patty was 4, her parents split; the girls’ father stayed in the Midwest and their mother took the kids to California. The parents tried to reconcile, but in part because of the abusive nature of their relationship the state Department of Children’s Services removed the girls from their mother’s care. The reconciliation failed and, despite the mother’s efforts, she has not yet been able to regain custody.

The courts did allow her to keep her youngest child, now 5. However, Patty and her 9- and 12-year-old sisters live in Monterey Park with their grandmother, Jamie, and four other relatives. Patty’s mom has to prove that she’s self-sufficient for the courts to return her other children.

“The girls see her quite a bit; they go to church on Sundays,” Jamie says of her daughter. “She tried to go to school, she’s worked at restaurants, now she’s answering phones for my niece’s business.”

Their father, meanwhile, only occasionally contacts his daughters, calling twice a year and on birthdays, according to Jamie. She says Patty may have been the hardest hit by the major changes in her family. She recently had a period of behavioral problems that worried her grandmother and the staff of the West San Gabriel Valley Boys & Girls Club.

April Dodge, program director of the club, says that the problems were surprising, particularly because she sees Patty as “creative, sensitive ... a positive influence” at the club. However, Patty seems to have regained some of her old self. Dodge says she is always happy to help out around the club. “Patty is a real leader in the group. Other kids gravitate to her.”

Patty didn’t get to go to camp last year because of a transportation mix-up, but she will attend the YMCA’s Camp Round Meadow near Big Bear this summer, thanks to the Los Angeles Times Summer Camp Campaign. There, she’ll go hiking and swimming and indulge her love of animals.

“She does have battles at home -- it’s hard when you live with other families,” her grandmother says. “But I think this will be a good thing for her.”

About 11,000 children will go to camp this summer, thanks to $1.6 million raised last year.

The annual fundraising campaign is part of the Los Angeles Times Family Fund of the McCormick Tribune Foundation, which this year will match the first $1.1 million in contributions at 50 cents on the dollar.

Donations are tax-deductible. For more information, call (213) 237-5771. To make donations by credit card, go to latimes.com/summercamp.

To send checks, use the attached coupon. Do not send cash.

Unless requested otherwise, gifts of $50 or more will be acknowledged in The Times.