Two Guys Lose Weight: Nutrisystem arrives

NOTE: This is a blog about two guys attempting to lose weight over a six-week period. They kicked off their weight loss “strategies” on Jan 10.

‘So easy, a caveman can do it.’ Not only one of the greatest slogans when the ads first came out a few years ago, but also my new motto on my quest to lose 25 pounds in 12 weeks.

I don’t want to think. Many people think I’ve achieved that goal already (long ago). But when it comes to dieting, I don’t want to guess. I want the instructions. Written down. Better yet, just give me the food. Even better: feed me.

Since I couldn’t find a diet plan in which people come to my office and place grapes in my mouth while playing the lute and recorder, I had to go with the next best thing (hopefully): Nutrisystem.

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The big box arrived Wednesday. Actually it was two boxes. One giant honking cardboard box and one Styrofoam box. The latter was filled with ice and frozen foods. I didn’t expect that. I really didn’t pay attention to what I ordered. I just went to the website and clicked stuff.

To be honest, I’m pleasantly surprised. Ice cream bars. Frozen pancakes. Ham and cheese omelets. Roast turkey medallions.

The frozen stuff is a new part of their plan, I’m learning. And the standard stuff came too: the numerous individual food packages that I just have to throw in the microwave and hit a button.

But the real test, of course, is the taste. I’ve done this before and some of it gets old.

And I enjoy the whole eating experience. The other night Judi and I had a very romantic dinner at a steakhouse in West Hollywood where we could watch the football game on a drive-in theater-like screen while seeing patrons (most in some form of inebriation) getting bucked off a live mechanical bull right in front of us. Awesome.

So variety is key when you want to dump the pounds. And my oatmeal-salad-broccoli diet was getting old.

And now 3:30 in the afternoon is the most stressful. The last two days I walked down to a colleague’s office and emptied out her gumball machine (the gumballs, not the money -- but that could change).

I had the frozen ham and cheese omelet Thursday morning (although I decided to cook it rather than eat it like an Popsicle). It was fantastic. I also had one slice of toast, some cantaloupe squares and some yogurt. All part of the plan I’m following.

And 15 minutes later, I’m not hungry! Success? We’ll see. But the omelet was very good.

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