Shutdown: Americans prefer zombies, hemorrhoids, IRS to Congress

1/10

In plans announced Friday, the Pentagon said that all active-duty personnel, reserve personnel and civilians performing essential activities would be required to stay on the job, though their Oct. 15 paychecks could be in limbo, if the shutdown continues. About 400,000 civilians, including tens of thousands in California, would be furloughed and would be paid retroactively only after congressional approval. The Department of Homeland Security is planning to furlough just less than 14% of its employees and only 4% of Veterans Affairs workers will be removed from duty. (Jacquelyn Martin / Associated Press)

2/10

Just a fraction of NASA’s more than 18,000 employees would remain on the job if the government shuts down, with all workers not “involved in the protection of life or property” set for furloughs. Examples of exempted employees include those monitoring the International Space Station and satellites, as well as researchers whose work would pose a danger if it were suspended. (NASA / Getty Images)

3/10

All 401 national parks and monuments will be shut down, with visitors required to depart from the premises immediately and overnight lodgers within two days. As with many agencies, only employees deemed essential to the protection of life and property would be kept on, with 21,379 Park Service employees and 37,000 others within the Department of the Interior set to be furloughed. (Rich Pedroncelli / Associated Press)

4/10

The Justice Department is planning on furloughing just 15.5% of its workforce, with 96,744 employees expected to remain on duty. Federal courts are expected to remain open until around Oct. 15, at which point the situation will be evaluated further, with furloughs possible. The Supreme Court, with its new term starting Oct. 7, will be unaffected by the shutdown. (Manuel Balce Ceneta / Associated Press)

5/10

Though presidential appointees are exempt from the effects of a government shutdown, along with other employees deemed essential, the White House plans for 1,265 of its 1,701 employees to be furloughed. (Brendan Smialowski / AFP/Getty Images)

6/10

According to the State Department’s shutdown plan, all non-essential employees will be furloughed, and passport services not housed in government buildings will “remain 100% operation as long as there are sufficient fees to support operations.” Embassies and foreign consulates will also remain open. (J. Scott Applewhite / Associated Press)

7/10

Since the Postal Service is a separate entity with its own funding, no deliveries or related services will be disrupted by the looming shutdown. (David Goldman / Associated Press)

8/10

Just 1,069 employees of the EPA’s total workforce of 16,205 will be exempt from furloughs due to their essential responsibilities, with a bare-bones staff responsible for a range of environmental emergency responses and property protection. (Ross D. Franklin / Associated Press)

9/10

Just 9.3% of the 94,516 IRS employees will be exempted from furloughs after a government shutdown, though the agency will continue to process tax returns and other limited functions. (Susan Walsh / Associated Press)

10/10

Though the Labor Department plans to continue paying unemployment benefits to those in need, it plans to furlough 13,350 of its 16,304 staff members. (Karen Bleier / AFP/Getty Images)

By Robin Abcarian

Oct. 8, 2013 9:47 AM PT

At this point, the polls are pretty consistent: Americans are angry about the budget and shutdown shenanigans in Washington, but they’re angrier at Republicans than they are at Democrats. Which should tell you something about who is really to blame for this mess.

But Public Policy Polling took things a step further, asking people whether they preferred Congress to a series of ailments, celebrities, serial killers and oft-loathed government agencies. Here’s what the polling group found:

Americans currently have a higher opinion of witches (46/32), jury duty (73/18) and hemorrhoids (53/31) than Congress. Republicans seem much more accepting of Congress over hemorrhoids compared to other voters -- 41% favored Congress more than the diseases, as opposed to only 25% of Democrats and 27% of Independents.

Even government institutions like the DMV and the IRS are seen as more favorable than Congress currently, at 58/24 and 42/33 respectively. Almost twice as many Republicans still support Congress over the IRS (48/25), while only 23% of Democrats do (23/59).

Half of registered voters have a higher opinion of Congress than of Anthony Weiner right now (50/23). In fact, public figures are some of the only people that registered voters dislike more than the legislature.

Americans thought higher of Congress when asked about Vladimir Putin (49/28), Charles Manson (56/18), Honey Boo Boo (42/33) and Miley Cyrus (36/31) – with “twerking” also four points below Congress at 37/33.

“Congress having an 8% approval rating tells us one thing about how unhappy voters are,” said Dean Debnam, President of Public Policy Polling. “But it’s even more telling that voters have a lower opinion of it than annoyances like the DMV and jury duty, health issues like hemorrhoids, and even witches.”

A poll like this almost seems like a practical joke, but it’s not. Public Policy Polling did a similar poll earlier this year, during the last debt ceiling fight, said polling specialist Jim Williams. “Our director, Tom Jensen, said ‘Let’s do a poll comparing Congress to a bunch of things people think are terrible. It’s for fun, but it’s not made up.’”

That poll, conducted in January, found Congress less popular than root canals, head lice, colonoscopies and Brussel sprouts.

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Twitter: @robinabcarian